I am feeling very nostalgic this morning. As I spend a lazy Sunday morning catching up on a few blogs that I follow, one grabs my heart…and my memories. One of my favorite bloggers recently had a baby. I read her birth story and enjoyed the pictures of that squishy, new baby. I caught tears coming down my face as I remember the birth of both of my girls.I remember the excitement of Lauren’s birth…our first child. Mo and I weren’t young kids…I was almost 30 and Mo was 36. However, we had no idea what we were doing or what to expect. We had spent our lives up to this point doing what we wanted when we wanted to do it. Now, we were having a baby…a small person that we were responsible for keeping alive! After 23 hours of labor and 3 hours of pushing, the doctor finally announced that it wasn’t going to happen and a C-section was necessary. That wasn’t the birth plan that I had ordered! God knew though…He knew what we needed. We needed a healthy baby…and she was perfect! She was VERY healthy at 8 lbs. 14 oz. Her apgar score was a 9. She has continued worrying about getting the highest scores possible on all her tests since then too!
We brought her home and that is when we realized…WE. KNEW. NOTHING. ABOUT. BABIES! I am serious…NOTHING! I remember crying in the middle of the night…”God, what were you thinking? How could you have made us the parents responsible for keeping this little tiny thing alive? I think we put the diaper on upside down…how do you expect us to do this?” I think that she was a little nervous also about the reality that we were her parents. But He knew…
Then…9 1/2 months later…the pregnancy test read positive! Really, God…again…WHAT. ARE. YOU. THINKING??? We HAVE a baby…we don’t need another one just yet!
I LOVE being pregnant! Absolutely LOVE it! I am usually put on bed rest for a moment here and there during my pregnancy. I had gestational diabetes both times. However, if you ask me, I will tell you that I have FABULOUSLY, WONDERFUL, UNEVENTFUL pregnancies! Those few moments in 9 months seem trivial compared to how great I feel the rest of the time!Anywho…I had a wonderful pregnancy with Lexie. I worked out until the day before her birth. We had a VBAC doctor who was a complete weight nazi so I only gained 22 lbs.
We I was FINALLY going to have my natural childbirth (no C-section but WITH an epidural)! I had been dilated to a 5 for 3 weeks but the doctor needed to wait until I was 37 weeks before inducing. When D-day came, we were soooo ready! I was given pitocin and things progressed very quickly. Unfortunately, Lexie got stuck! After much panic by the doctor and nurses, she was delivered but lifeless! Her first apgar was a 3, and her 5 minute apgar was only a 7. She was 3 weeks early and weighed in at 9 lbs. 1 oz. Even in the NICU, she looked up at us with lazy eyes as if to say “Chill out, Mom and Dad! Everything is going to be ok!” THIS has been my Lexie’s way of doing life every since! Even through all of our fears that day, God knew…
As I sit in our quiet house here in the Dominican, I think back to those two moments in our life. As our children are navigating their way around a village in a third world country…emerging into the unknown like they did that day 12 and 14 years ago, I hear God say :
“For I know the plans I have for you plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future.”
As we hear others talk about how independent and brave our beautiful daughters are, our hearts explode with pride and admiration!
As we hear our girls communicating with others in a brand new language, our hearts explode with pride and admiration!
As we see our girls doing relationships of complete respect and love with others whose lives have been completely opposite of the opulent life they left in TN, our hearts explode with pride and admiration!
As we see our girls caring for and giving themselves to the people and animals of this community, our hearts explode with pride and admiration!
They have adjusted so well and matured in so many ways. Before moving here, we had so many worries, concerns, and fears for what this move meant for our girls. Now, we are in complete awe because we had no idea what to expect!